Listening to Learn is informed by the simple observation that we have two ears and one mouth. If we can learn to listen at least twice as much as we talk, we have automatically increased out effectiveness. Yet, the process of actively listening to learn has a few more skills associated with it.
To the extend there is fear around being shamed or blamed for undesired outcomes, we will create cultures in our organization and behavior in individuals of denial, finger-pointing to deflect the blame, defensiveness to corrective feedback, sweeping things under the carpet and a lot of CYA.
The Courage to Be Vulnerable means that you let people know that you need them, that you need their inputs, ideas, insights and concerns. Vulnerability means that you have the strength to ask for help, to admit you don’t know and that you can’t do it all by yourself.
Tough-Love is the capacity to have the courageous, difficult conversations, to hold self and others to account, while doing it in a respectful, caring and engaging tone and manner.
In the long run, invitation is infinitely more powerful than coercion. If you want to become even more powerfully effective, then you need to learn to invite others to join with you.
Thinking about and practicing drawing the larger circle, the bigger framework helps you to become someone who creates winning solutions with others, increasing your influence, personal power and the willing engagement of others so that you can be even more of a wholehearted leader and power in this world.
Here are two foundational steps to becoming more effective and a “force of nature” in your relationship and interactions.
Creating your life as if it really mattered is the essence of spell breaking because you take control of your mind instead of your mind controlling you.
Whenever we break a spell by shining the light of awareness and conscious attention on an old, outdated and sub-optimizing way of thinking, a spell, we create more effective ways of thinking, perceiving and of imagining our lives, families, work and way of being in this universe.
When you learn to shift perspective, you activate the powers of imagination, liberating innovation, imagination and overall effectiveness.